Our Trip to the Doctor

Today was the day we were to find out if our baby was sporting "frank and beans" or a "vajayjay". In case you don't know me very well you should understand I am not going to be speaking in clinical terms here. Slang and off-color lingo only on this site. If you are easily offended, tough.

These appointments in general are pretty stressful. Right now we are 3 weeks between appointments with our doctors so for those 3 weeks we freak out any time anything is out of the ordinary. Ally eats cheese, gets a stomach ache, freak out. Ally is tired, freak out. Ally has a head ache, freak out. You see where I am going with this. We freak out a lot because this whole "having a kid thing" is new to us.

And don't get me started on the internet or pregnancy books. These make me crazy. For example, type in "cramps: lower stomach". The search returns are veritable cornucopia of stories from "real people" who at one time or another while they were pregnant had cramps in their lower stomach. In Ally's case, it was the baby growing. And the books are worse. I think the only thing I've learned is that everybody is different.

As I was saying before I lost track, these appointments are stressful because it's been 3 weeks with no feedback, no doctor telling us things look good. That drives people like Ally and me (control freaks? maybe?) up the wall. Ally is going all Tom Cruise and wants to buy an ultrasound machine. When she calms down she settles on stealing a stethoscope from her Grandmas place in Ojai. The thing is, there are times during those 3 weeks where I don't think either of those are bad ideas.

Today was especially stressful because we decided we were tired of calling the baby "IT" and wanted to know what "IT" was. When we started out Ally didn't want to know but over time I wore her down and she agreed to find out. We don't like surprises.

So here's how it went down, and it didn't take long. Ally told the nurse we wanted to know and within 3 seconds of touching the ultra sound to her pooch (Ally loves it when I call it pooch...it's not a belly yet...too small) the baby appeared. IT (still IT at this point) appeared to be sitting back with his legs spread and his junk hanging out for all to see. There he was, OUR SON.

Here's the first look.....

Quite a day. Quite an appointment. Quite a package. Today I am a proud dad. It's the first of what I expect to be many proud moments in fatherhood.

Don't Call It a Comeback...

Well, it's been about 1.5 years since I've graced this page. 1.5 years since i've been at my current job. Coincidence? Absolutely not. My job has absolutely monopolized my time for the past 1.5 years.

1.5 years isn't that long, but it really is. What happens in 1.5 years. One only need look as far back as this specific blog to see. Let's catch up on where the subjects of some of my previous blogs are today:

• This "pundit" thought UofA forward and prodigy Marcus Williams was going to set the world on fire during the 2006-2007 season. What happened? He turned out to be a fraud who left school early and is now playing in Kazakhstan (HIGH FIVE!). Good bye.
• What About Brian. I had high hopes for this show. I lost interest quickly when they put it on at the same...time...as...Horatio...*lower sunglasses*...Caine.
• Tom Cruise - Still crazy and I still don't care about his kid or Stepford Wife. Jerry O'Connell, awesome
  
• I still LOVE the TV.
  
• I still LOVE me some UofA hoops
• I just finished the second version of the MLB video game that I bagged on in previous entries. Good thing they didn't see those posts before they hired me...actually, that might not have been a bad thing.

So that's a brief overview. So, some things have changed but I am mostly the same. A little older. Somewhat wiser. Better dressed (thanks Ally). Sometimes bitter. Sometimes very happy (am I bi-polar like Britney?). Always interesting.

SO, you might be asking why the hell I would start blogging again. The reason is twofold:

1) I love to write. I love to take what is on my mind and after some heavy editing of profanity and objectionable content, letting other people read it. I just like to write.
2) Mine and Ally's life is about to change dramatically for the BETTER. We have a son on the way in a few months (June to be exact) and I feel like other folks *could* want to know what's going on in our lives. My cousins Josh and Erin do a GREAT job keeping family up to date on their adventure in the Northwest and their beautiful daughter Abigail. I thought, "hey, this is interesting stuff. Maybe my family might be interested in what we're doing?!?!" This is VERY exciting news.

Anyway, this won't be limited to baby talk, though me thinks there will be a fair amount of that. I will continue to go off on tangenets, rants, sidebars, Non Sequiturs, rants, rants and more rants. I am what I am.

Without further ado, I'm back and I hope you enjoy or at least aren't offended. I can't promise you will or won't be either. That didn't make sense. I'm done now.