My Life-Long Friend and Downfall - The Idiot Box Part 1

I have always had a very good relationship with the television. She has always been there for me in good times and bad. She never passes judgement. She never complains. She just sits there and entertains me. She is the perfect friend.

It started with shows like "Sesame Street", "Mr. Rogers Neighborhood", "Emergency", "The Incredible Hulk", "BJ and the Bear" and of course "CHiPs". Shows like these began my life long love affair with the TV. What's more than that are 5 events that forever redefined and changed TV for not only me, but I am sure millions of other television afficiandos like myself.

Event 1

My relationship with the TV was in it's early stages when the geniuses at Scientific Atlanta (a division of Cisco) went ahead and turned the world on its ear. Well, maybe not the entire world but mine at least. I can't pinpoint the exact day or sequence of events, but because I have a flair for the dramatic I am going to guess. Maybe fabricate is a better word, however the gist of the story remains actual and factual.

There was a brisk air blowing through the small town of Gilroy, California. It began like any other autumn day . I woke up, ate a hearty breakfast then jumped in the carpool for the short jaunt to St. Mary School for another ho-hum day of elementary school in the 4th grade class of one Carol Figone. We were learning our times tables. What came next is the origin of why to this day I possess remedial math schools.

By the time school ended that day the winds had stopped blowing. What began as a cold and uncomfortable day had turned into a still and temperant afternoon. I couldn't wait to get home and head outside for some afternoon shenanigans. Maybe I could round up a game of baseball at the park? Who knew. The world was my oyster this day, though I had no idea what was waiting for me in the living room.

When I got home the cable guy was there and with him was a light brown box he was hooking up to the TV. It was no bigger than my math text book I was supposed to be looking at in order to master my "times tables". But it was what this little brown box could do and what my math books couldn't what changed my life.

Turns out this box was a "cable box". Until that day we only received channels 2-13 on both our black and white TV in the family room and the 19 inch color TV in the living room. This little brown box received channels 2-36 including HBO and MTV!

(Editor's note: HBO was where I saw my first, ahem, jiggly lady parts while watching Purple Rain with my cousin Gerry. MTV is where I love my ability to focus for more than 3 minutes at a time. Stupid music videos)

However, looking back now, all was not as rosy as it seemed. It was that day that my career as an engineer, doctor or mathmatician died. For I did not work on my times tables that afternoon or any afternoon following. I also learned I couldn't read. All because of Scientific Atlanta and their fancy "little brown box." That part about me not being able to read is a lie.

Stay Tuned for Part 2...

The Start of Something....Interesting?

Mission Statement: I like to write. I always have. I take great pride in my ability to put pen to paper and articulate what's on my mind. I enjoy reading other people's thoughts and opinions. The thing I have found is that often I disagree with these opinions or go away with more questions than answers. I decided instead of persistently clogging my friends inbox with emails about these things I would start my own blog instead.

Apparently these blogs are quite popular. Who knew? Anyway, I am putting it all out there for anybody or nobody to see. I don't expect anybody to read this (other than my proud mother, my brother who listens quite well, and my wife who is sick of me telling her about the story I read on the internet or complaining about the fella on ESPN who yells because he has nothing relevant or interesting to say). Who knows, you may learn more about my family as this blog evolves.

One of my college journalism professors said I have a "flowery writing style". To this day I am not sure what that meant, or if it was good or bad, but what I do know is that I will either prove or disprove that on this blog. In the meantime I hope that some enjoyment is attained through reading my blog. That enjoyment can be either of the "he's funny and interesting" variety, or the "this dude is retarded and is all that is wrong with the internet" variety. Enjoyment is enjoyment. So, uh, enjoy "The Sound of My Own Voice". I know I do.

PS: In spellchecking this entry I discoved that the blogger.com spellchecker doesn't recognize "blog" as a word. Ironic, don't ya think?